It’s been said that love blinds people. It creates intoxicating feelings of attraction, and for someone with low self-esteem, this blinding effect can have devastating results. Being in abusive relationships can completely play havoc or destroy a person’s life.
Usually abusive relationships start in the early years of dating as a teen and then the abuse escalates into domestic violence as we age. In the beginning of a relationship the behavior may seem fairly minor. As the relationship goes on, it becomes worse.
Are you in an Abusive Relationship?
Does your partner:
- Have serious issues controlling his or her temper?
- Blame you for things that are not your fault?
- Threaten suicide or self-harm if you were to end the relationship?
- Punch walls or break things in anger?
- “Playfully” slap, push or wrestle in a way that seems abnormal?
- Yell, curse or otherwise verbally abuse when angry?
- Attempt to force you into situations or activities that you aren’t comfortable with, sexual or otherwise?
- Hit, punch, slap or otherwise physically assault you in anger?
- Refuse to accept responsibility for his or her mistakes?
- Act controlling or jealous over other things that take up your time, including work, hobbies and other friendships?
When Should you get help?
All of the above are signs of an abusive relationship. Some should be taken more seriously than others. It’s possible for a partner in a healthy relationship to raise his or her voice, occasionally get jealous or make some other mistake. If you see one of these minor red flags, you shouldn’t necessarily end the relationship, but you should have a talk with your partner about it.
If things escalate, it’s time to get help. I find that most people in abusive relationship defend their partners actions and are blind to the dysfunction of the relationship. If your friends and family keep telling you to get out of the relationship because he/she is abusive, it probably is. If you have even an inkling that your partner might be abusive, go talk to an expert.
