Is it important to speak your truth?
The importance of speaking your truth can sometimes feel like a life or death situation. If we hold our truth in it feels like it might eat us alive. Keep in mind the truth I’m talking about is from the higher self not from the ego mind. When we stop the ego from acting out this is a good thing.
I have a client that faced having to act out of her truth and build a bigger wall between her and her daughter or just pretending and making nice just to keep her relationship with her. She had to disengage from the situation, knowing that her daughter’s decisions have nothing to do with her. That this is her daughter’s learning and that part of her learning is to let go, not judge the situation and not take what her daughter is saying personally.
This may have been an easier situation to handle if it would’ve been a friend or colleague but it was her daughter, which makes the cost so much higher. If the mother wouldn’t have spoken her truth and just held it in, resentment would’ve grown and eventually she would projected onto her daughter anyway.
In some important for us to stand in our truth, even if it means the loss of loved ones. I know that I have told the story before about my father and his drinking, but here it goes again. When my mother died, my father became a full-time alcoholic or before he was just a binging alcoholic. I would take my daughter’s then four and five years old over to see him and he would be drunk. I asked him if there was any time during the day where he wasn’t drinking where I would be able to bring the girls over to see him. He accused me of telling him to stop drinking, when actually I just wanted to know if there was a time when he wasn’t to bring the girls. I made this choice because it was a healthy choice for my girls and myself, didn’t see it that way and continued to drink my father so I stopped seeing him.
This felt like a very conscious choice for me but a hard decision to make because my dad thought I was being a horrible daughter. But I was just taking care of the needs of my daughters and myself. So I had to let go and not take it personally. So the loss was huge for me because I lost the relationship with my father. Even though I know that having a relationship with an alcoholic isn’t really a relationship with love and connection anyways.
It is very tricky when looking at speaking your truth because we have to make sure it’s her truth from our higher self not our ego minds so before we speak our truth we first must examine where it’s coming from. Then and only then do we either take action that supports our truth or speak if we need to.