The weight of regret and the lack of forgiveness.
When working with mothers and daughters, I notice that there is a lot of regret and an unwillingness to forgive. Regret can be something we have for things we have done in the past to others or ourselves. Mothers usually have regret about not showing up a certain way for their daughters. It is so important to forgive our inability to parent without having the tools we need at that given time. Forgiveness is so important and to grant us the grace for being human in those moments.
Daughters may have regrets about how they behaved while growing up and causing their parents such grief in their younger years. This also requires forgiveness and just knowing that you did the best that you could with a very young mind. We only know what we know in that moment and shouldn’t beat ourselves up for our blind spots.
Other regrets can just be about certain things in our past that we did or didn’t do and again we can only do what we are capable of doing and that particular moment. There is no reason to regret past situations. Each and every situation that happens, happens for our higher learning. The best thing we can do is embrace all of our past moments and behaviors and bring love to them.
When we hold on to regret it’s like having our past tied to us, which makes it tough to move forward. It saps our energy leaving us less available for the present moment because we are always in the past. Constantly feeding that part of our life can cause sickness as well. If we aren’t living in the moment and were feeding old issues it can create illness in our bodies.
Living in the past and our old issues can also re-create them because we are putting so much energy into the old belief. When we have regret it means we haven’t moved through or healed our old beliefs or childhood wounds.
When we bring in forgiveness it heals our regret. There are so many ways we can work on forgiving. The biggest thing I believe is to have an understanding that every situation plays out a certain way for my higher learning. When I have this way of thinking it helps me either not going to regret at all or forgive myself for something I was regretting. If you are struggling with regret and not able to forgive either yourself or someone else, you may want to have a conversation with the other person or even your inner child. Discuss what happened and come up with a way to let go, forgive, and move forward.
If you are looking for support around being more conscious, check out my retreats and mentoring. The individual intensive, the couples retreat, or the mother-daughter retreat, you will learn about yourself and how to clean up your past so you can move through this life with love and passion.
If you are interested in my Individual Retreat, Adult Mother Daughter Retreat or a Couples Retreat or Mentoring so you can look at the things that aren’t working in your life and shift them, Click HERE to schedule your free consult. Or call me at 928-300-0447.
Also check out what clients are saying about me in their Testimonials!
“As soon as we began I knew this was the direction I was wanting to go. I felt Debra was spot on with where the feelings are coming from and truly gifted me with the tools to care for those feelings. She did such a great job at turning an ugly/hurt filled situation into a meaningful, purposeful, beautiful experience. I love the way I see and feel about myself, my mom and our relationship… Not only with each other, but with every body else in life. I can’t thank you enough, Debra. You are such a gift! I feel blessed to share in this experience.
-With love, Jennifer (Daughter)
Debra, thank you so much for helping me to connect with my daughter and myself. I’m very glad that I chose you in this reconnecting process!”
-Sincerely, Julia (Mom)